hahah That's why I hate working in retail
I worked in a computer showroom many years ago. We had this Asian guy who was quite regular with his PC problems.. we helped him but weren't meant to as we were only meant to be selling the computers. Our tech support was a premium line where the wait time was like 40mins+ so yeah they were being charged per minute on hold! Anyway, this guy phones up one day and speaks to my colleague..
him: "My keys are missing"
colleague: "Your keys are missing? What do you mean?"
him: "They're gone"
colleague: "Your keyboard is missing?"
him: "No. Just the keys"
... after about 15mins if this kinda bullshit, my colleague finally finds out he meant the letters on a few keys had faded!
Another threatened to sue the company because he cut his finger while opening a machine